Nicknames: STL Cardinals

Hey ya'll! I know this one was a long wait, but I'm glad you made it! Here is the first post in my newest series, "Nicknames", where I will be filling you in on the nicknames that I have for the 25 man roster of every baseball team! And trust me, some of them are kinda odd! Let me know what you think!

Matt Bowman: "Archer"

 Not to be related to the hit TV show, Matt Bowman's name is pretty obvious....Bow.....man. I didn't have to think too hard about that one. A stellar reliever this year, he seems to really have the accuracy to take an apple off of his buddy's head.

John Brebbia: "Redbeard the Pirate"

A recent acquisition of the Cardinals, Brebbia has had a pretty solid year even if he had been used only 30 times. With his magnificent ginger beard and his ability to plunder outs, I had to give him a befitting name. Hopefully he is hiding some of his skills under the sand on some deserted island and will dig it up in September to help the birds make the postseason.

Brett Cecil: "Hacker"

To me, Cecil looks like any stereotypical representation of a hacker nerd. Maybe it is the glasses....or his tiny face. Seems like the hacker needs to get off his computer and into the bullpen more, though, as Brett has had a hell of a time this year. Hopefully he'll crack the code and fix his pitching issues before the season ends.

Zach Duke: "Sir Zach"

 All bow before Sir Zach, the Lord of Busch III! One royal reference later and a Duke is turned into a knight I guess. Another recent acquisition for the Cardinals and another struggling pitcher. After dealing with major injuries, Zach hasn't looked right. Maybe he can call upon his fiefdom to help him out and get a few more strikeouts this year.

Mike Leake: "Bruh"

The Cardinals renowned surfer dude looking guy. Don't you wish you had hair like this guy? But seriously, this year has looked like a guy riding some waves for Leake. After a hot start, Leake has been up and down over the course of the season and is hoping to catch a big wave in these last few games to help the Cards ride into October.

Lance Lynn: "Lance"

Give him credit, the guy has a pretty cool first name. He also isn't known the be the standout guy in St. Louis. Drafted by the Cardinals in the 1st round in 2008, Lynn has put in solid work with little to no injuries over his career. Not a Cy Young player, he won't be world renown, but a 3.32 career ERA shows a solid starting pitcher that knows what consistency is. Lynn has 10 wins for the Cardinals this year and is one of their top starters over the past 5 years.

Tyler Lyons: "Truth"

Are you Lyons? No! I'm telling the truth! 29 years old and still a minor league call up, Lyons has shown flashes of greatness and lots of mediocre. It is hard to tell where this guy sits in the Show. Maybe one of these days Matheny will believe him and keep him up in St. Louis for the long haul.

Carlos Martinez: "Tsunami"

Seriously though, this is his real nickname (and his Instagram handle). I don't know who gave it to him or why, but it's pretty stellar. Carlos has been one of the best pitchers for the Cardinals this season and only really has a poor W-L record because he gets no run support. I see a bright future for this 26 year old gem.

Seung Hwan Oh: "Final Boss"

Again, his real nickname and it is incredible. Picked up from Japan, the Cardinals have recently been using him as their closer (hence, final boss). Having a rough go of it this year, he was phenomenal last year. Let's see if he can get back to his final form and really smash up the competition.

Sam Tuivailala: "Tuivailalelalelalelaelaelalelaleallelaeaelalealelae"

It is kinda fun exaggerating the "lala" in his name and being a little silly. And geez do I exaggerate. Though I should give him more credit than I do. Sam has been one of the top relievers in a struggling bullpen and he is going to need to continue that if the Cardinals have any chance at a playoff spot.

Michael Wacha: "Wachapocalype"

My favorite player on the Cardinals (as you may have read I went to his MLB debut game), Wacha dominates the competition in Fallout-esque style. Staying healthy this year has been big for Wacha and he has been incredible to watch this year. As long as he can avoid having that shoulder injury come back, rivals teams should be afraid of his nuclear arsenal of pitches.

Adam Wainwright: "Waino"

Being an old boy for the Cardinals means that people call you shortened things of your name. While he doesn't have the same stuff as his former self (5.00+ ERA YIKES), Waino can definitely hit and has still been able to get enough outs and wins to be a valuable member of the Cardinals rotation. Hopefully he can win a 3rd World Series with them before he takes his bow.

Luke Weaver: "Basketcase"

With a name like Weaver and an inconsistent pitching record so far, basketcase seemed to fit fine. It will be interesting to see how this young talen progressives over his career. He has only pitched 50 innings so far with the big leagues and holds an ERA over 5.00, although it is much better this year. This kid just needs some time to work through some headaches and maybe them the nickname will change.

Carson Kelly: "Not Yadi"

Another young kid in the organization, he is supposed to be the replacement to Yadier one day. That day is not today. Batting .182 this year with 5 RBI in 22 AB, he is still fresh and needs some more tutelage from Molina before he can hit his real potential. Hopefully he turns into another superstar catcher.

Yadier Molina: "Yadi"

This guy doesn't need an into. He doesn't need an explanation. Every time he come up to bat all of the fans chant "YA-Di YA-DI YA-DI" and he deserves it all. Gold gloves, All star nominations, World Series rings, this guy has it all. Keep it going, man. No one runs on Yadier Molina.

Matt Carpenter: "Jesus"

Jesus was a carpenter and Matt is a Carpenter. I think you see the correlation. This guy also has a divine eye when it comes to seeing the baseball. Besides his biggest year in 2013, this is his second best year in OBP with a .383 OBP. He also is on pace to have more walks this season then any season since 2014. One of the most consistent batters in the game with a .280 AVG over 6 seasons, Matt is a staple in the infield. Hopefully he can bring the Cards to the promised land. By the way, my fiance picked this guy as her favorite player because of his nickname. She thought it was funny how he is a Carpenter.


Jose Martinez: " OLE' "

This is what I say every time this guy hits it seems. .281 and 9 home runs into this season, Jose has finally earned a spot on the big league club after trying so hard. I'd love to see him stay up from Memphis and really pound some balls from the bench.

Luke Voit: "Big Cat"

Although he didn't go to Eureka High School in STL, he was born and raised close to their and is now the hometown hero on the Cardinals. The Eureka Wildcats are what his nickname is off of and the "Big" is due to his size. He is a good replacement to Matt Adams in terms of power and pure bulk.

Paul DeJong:"DJ Paul"

Keep the capital letters in his last name and what do you have? Reminds me of the little monkey that came on after every Jimmy Neutron episode when I was a kid saying "Hi! I'm Paul". This kid has been ON FIRE. After taking over the starting position at SS, he is now hitting 18 home runs, 43 RBI, and a .300 AVG in just over half a season's worth of play. That is HOT. When doesn't he drive in runs and hit RBI? So excited to see the DJ make some sweet hits in October.

Kolten Wong: "The Dragon"

A tattoo and the ability to make balls fly, Kolten definitely is the dragon. I totally thought his tattoo was of a dragon too, of which it is not. Having a tough year and in need of some oomph in the lineup, the Cardinals put in Paul DeJong instead (playing off with almost 20 home runs this season already). Hopefully the dragon can make a comeback. I have a signed ball and I want it to be worth something someday!

Greg Garcia: "Scotch"

Like the Duct Tape, Garcia patches up the Cardinals well. He can play almost any infield position and is a great hitter off the bench as well. A utility player who does his job well is invaluable.

Jedd Gyorko: "The Jerk"

Pronouncing his last name is a lot of fun. I've heard Jedd is a swell guy and not a jerk at all, but he is a jerk to opposing teams. 57 RBIs and 16 home runs is a pretty decent season, and one that is well above average for the 5th year player. It is a good thing that Matt Carpenter is so versatile because Jedd has been a major force in the Cardinals offense this year.

Randall Grichuk: "The Grinch"

Hitting homers, diving for catches, this guy is known for stealing games and taking away hits. It was only fitting to call him the grinch that stole the game. a versatile outfielder and a powerful hitter, Grichuk is a great player who falls into a lot of slumps. I am looking forward to the day when he figures out that swing of his and really jumpstarts the Cardinals into the division lead.

Dexter Fowler: "Sexy Dexy"

Based off of a tweet that Dexter sent a few months ago asking fans not to call him Sexy Dexy, obviously everyone now calls him that. A great acquisition by the Cardinals this last offseason, Sexy Dexy has had a pretty decent season this year with 15 home runs and a .258 AVG. It's also great to have a player with so much charisma on the team. Good thing he'll be around for a good amount of time!

Tommy Pham: "Phamtastic"

 What a phamtastic young player for the Birds. A .310 AVG and 14 home runs is a great year for anyone and Pham is eating it up. Part of the Cardinal's permanent "fam" now, he has found a home in center field. Glad to see him coming out of his shell and wowing baseball heaven.


Hope you enjoyed some of the names! If you'd like to see more of these for your own teams please share this with your friends! Comment below the team that I should do next. Till next time...


----For more insights into the 2017 baseball season keep checking back at "Off the Bench". Hope you enjoyed! Please comment your opinions and I'll see you in the next blurb.-----